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The Cozy Spot

32 posts categorized "blogging"

July 30, 2008

When Blogs Get Big for Their Virtual Boots?

Blogging can be a beastly endeavor that may - at times -require tenacity and persistence. This post follows the previous post on censoring/moderating to the point of micromanaging image. There are no clear rules and although there are many blogs that offer 'How-To' advice, no formula works, and the only advice that may (just may, but not 100%) is 'schmoozing' but what to do if you have no time to schmooz? People tend to desire overnight success, but there is no such thing  - even within the real world, and in relation to blogs, what is success? Sometimes it can feel like a treadmill, and other times, when bloggers do step beyond their blog to read other content, or give feedback, they may come across the megalomaniacal blogger who moderates like mad. Then there is the other phenomenon, one that I've noticed over the last three years:

Continue reading "When Blogs Get Big for Their Virtual Boots?" »

July 25, 2008

When Bloggers Censor & When Censors are 'Feminists'

I was stuck for a title for this post: Blog snobbery? When Zealotry Unfolds? I couldn't make up my mind because there is something that irritates me in the blogosphere and it's a common phenomenon that unfolds when bloggers think that their too big for their Jimmy Choos, or so 'huge' and celebrity-like that they manipulate feedback. A portion of these illustrious bloggers manage their image, or cultivate a persona and they'll also screen every comment that doesn't agree with what they write about. The comment doesn't have to be angry, troll-ish or crass. It can be an ordinary comment that makes a valid point, but here's the thing - if the point doesn't benefit the celebrity-like blogger, then it is moderated, or eliminated from the discussion.

Many bloggers go on about freedom of speech, privacy (in regard to their identities) and some are often the first to criticize Big Brother tactics. In the realm of feminist blogging, it's all about oppression and The Patriarchy. In Twisty's world, it is about the patriarchy, and I'm guessing, oppression, so it's quite amusing to be a female, leave a comment under a post about burlesque dancers, and find the comment to be cut from the 140 or so comments within that post. I personally don't judge a blog by the number of comments it has when bloggers moderate every comment, and remove comments that disagree with their views. I also get irritated when other similar bloggers whine about freedoms and oppression.

Is there freedom of speech on the web when the small portion of a-list bloggers edit/moderate like fanatics - more concerned about their own image, to the extent where they only publish adoring comments or comments that are always in agreement with them? Recently, I came across a collection of the 50 Most Powerful Blogs, in The Guardian, and I had to laugh because I hadn't heard of most of them, and I asked myself, if they were indeed powerful or were powerful just because a newspaper listed them as being powerful? Have some of these blogs changed society at grass roots level or were they just egotistic ramblings, you know, blog 'authors' going on about their personal plights and marketing their books, as they censored comments they didn't like to appear in their blogs?

My controversial 'censored' comment in Twisty's burlesque topic wasn't rude, but it appears that many 'influential' bloggers can't handle certain things, like the fact of there being other more significant issues affecting women, than burlesque dancing. But I'm betting the first thing I said, in relation to the 'I hate patriarchy' feminism, was more controversial: every radical, man hating feminist arrived on this earth via the union of an ovum and sperm. How do I view online feminism as a woman, when a group of supposedly feminist bloggers only publish comments they 'like' and censor comments other women may make? I view it as a popularity vehicle. A gimmick. I can understand comment moderation to prevent spam, abusive comments (that are unrelated to a subject), but the censorship that occurs to maintain a specific image is what disappoints me about blogging and it leads me to one conclusion, that of a portion of these high flying, 'supposedly' powerful bloggers, cannot handle others' truths, views or experiences. They can only deal with their immediate truths that unfold within their two-dimensional world so they remove comments they don't like (or comments that don't fit in with their ideal image), and that is why blogging isn't a perfect example of freedom of speech.

When bloggers oppress readers (male or female), by censoring comments they either cannot handle, or don't feel compliment their image of 'celebrity blogger', it is plain censorship and/or oppression, and ironically enough, when that occurs in the feminist blog precinct, the issue of feminism becomes a joke. Imagine...being a female and being censored by a feminist blogger. It's an oxymoron, is it not?

Blogging: The cradle of democracy or hypocrisy? There are days when I lean more toward the latter. Especially when bloggers write articles against censorship (in known newspapers) and moderate their blogs like crazy (eliminating comments that don't fit in with their ego).

Dreaming in Blog Mode

It's only natural to have dreams that may reflect your daily activities. This morning, my blog post about the freaky Anonymous protesters entered my dream had nothing to do with the Martin Luther King Jr 'I have a dream' speech, but it somehow entered my dream state. It was more like 'Creeping Jesus, I have a freaky dream, get me out of here! Wake up!' type of dream.

I was in a public place that resembled a library, and news broke out that there were strange people in town. The gossip reached an eerie crescendo. Two librarians told visitors to stay inside. They brought out a portable television for all five of us to watch and the news was grim, with news broadcasters saying that authorities weren't sure of one thing - that of the strangers being human. "They have human enough bodies but their heads!" There I was, standing near the checkout desk remembering the original black and white film of The Fly, especially the end, where the Fly-man is caught in a spider's web and his half fly-human body struggling (and his squeaky voice saying, 'help me, help me!').

Silly things unfold in dreams, such as being incapable of sprinting from scary monsters. It's like slow motion, the 'heeeel-ppppp...m-eeeee,' accompanied by your brain saying, 'hurry up, fuck you!'

Back at the dream library, I see two men in suits, and they're not wearing white masks (like the freaky Anonymous protesters in my blog post),they're wearing something stranger than any fiction I've read. They remind me of robots except they're not mechanical. They have large black lens like attachments on their heads, so you can only see the glass, not the face behind it. They're hanging around outside the library door, looking in, and then I realize something else (the stupid thing that happens in dreams). The door isn't locked! I mean seriously! Get me the dream director! I think I have a horror movie director in my brain, you know the type, that always makes the female victim fall and sprain her ankle just as she's about to get out of the creepy house? That type of director.

Freak dude 1 enters the library and looks around, but he has the mask on so it freaks everyone out. I figure, that it's a lost cause anyway, so I may as well jump the freak to get out and find, to my surprise that he's a pushover - skinny (skinnier than me) and combat challenged (if a girl can whip his arse). In fact, he may be a metrosexual, because I grab his makeshift gun and aim it at him telling him he's going to get it first, followed by his mate outside. He doesn't move, but keeps giving me lens-filthies trying to scare the shit out of me so I yank off his mask and see a daggy looking guy that looks like a first year arts student and I don't know what pisses me off more, the fear he induced or his real identity, because I just shoot the pissant.

There is no bullet. There's no loud sound, but he winces like a little girl who just had her braids tugged. Then the second lens-dude enters and starts shooting me, and it stings. Yes it stings! And then I realize what's going on. What nerds, I think. They loaded their custom made weapon with acid, but it's diluted. It stings, but that's about it - until I see the dial beneath the weapon, and remember my chemistry.

You want strong asshole, here's strong, so I turn the dial to 1 - a pH of 1, and start shooting like a crazed teenager with an uber water gun. The first one cries out, 'ouch! that hurts,' and the second dude attempts to be Vincent Price (with a screechy voice), telling me, 'you'll never get out of here.' I tell him he's wrong, and keep on, until I woke.

What a crazy blog influenced dream!

Now you'd think that after all the sex stories I've written that I'd dream about sex stories. Why is God cruel to me? I don't know. Last week, I won 32 dollars in Powerball and if that's not cruel enough, this week I won a measly ten dollars (not enough to buy a packet of smokes for God's sake!). Talk about being taunted by an unknown power.

July 11, 2008

YouTube Spice

DH Spicy has been blogging about adult sites for quite a while now, and has put together a video promotion via YouTube that includes a number of blogs/links. I'm chuffed to be included. You can check out the video on his blog or on YouTube.

June 17, 2008

Blogging and the Law

It's something that few bloggers would stop to consider, but the story of a blogger who was arrested under the Sedition Act of Singapore because of his blog is bound to make the news. He was arrested, attended a hearing and is currently out on bail.

Section 3 (1) of the law is below:

          A seditious tendency is a tendency —
(a) to bring into hatred or contempt or to excite disaffection against the Government;
(b) to excite the citizens of Singapore or the residents in Singapore to attempt to procure in Singapore, the alteration, otherwise than by lawful means, of any matter as by law established;
(c) to bring into hatred or contempt or to excite disaffection against the administration of justice in Singapore;
(d) to raise discontent or disaffection amongst the citizens of Singapore or the residents in Singapore;
(e) to promote feelings of ill-will and hostility between different races or classes of the population of Singapore.

These sorts of events may seem to be miles away from where I sit, or from where you sit, but they do have the potential of becoming real. Whether it is Singapore or anywhere else, sedition (as a legal definition) is sedition. The above terms can be modified for any country.


May 16, 2008

Changing the Wardrobe

A blog is very much like a wardrobe for me. Time will go by, and then I'll take a peek, and finally decide to change something, or get rid of something. But I'm much better with my blog than my wardrobe.

I've decided to change my banner. I'm over the black and white image of come hither female with snake. I figured it wasn't playful enough, and too serious, and although life/sex can be taken seriously, there are many absurdities that unveil the funny or lighter side of everything. So it's back to photoshop, to work out a new banner.

I wish I could be that way with my real-life wardrobe. I have things in it that do need to be thrown out, and I hoard them - like I'll need them for a nuclear holocaust or something. I have plenty white elephant buys that I regret. There is the transparent black mesh top of 2000. It's sleek, transparent and fitting my boobs into it now raises my blood pressure (which could be a good thing as I have low blood pressure as it is). Then there are the maroon (yeah, maroon...unbelievable, but they were on sale in 2001) denim jeans I have that are two sizes too small. They are the 'When' purchase, as in, "I'll wear those when I shed a few pounds." It's a sin that most women make. I've seldom come across men who have purchased something 'just in case they shift pounds.' By all means, this list isn't limited to clothes. I have made disastrous lingerie purchases as well.

The most expensive white elephant in my wardrobe would have to be my Pierre Cardin wool wrap skirt of 1990. Sure, it's classic. It can be worn today, and I bought it for $300.00 way back in '90, but it just feels wrong when I wear it. It's as though my body frets each time I put it in. When I wear it, I feel like I'm wearing a dead weight.But do you think I've thrown it out? Why of course not.

My most hated item of lingerie is my Jag thong. Designer undies can be nice, but others can be tragic based on design. My Jag thong has metallic decorations on its band, and lord, each time I wear it I have visions of monks torturing themselves for their sins. The metal attachments dig into my flesh, and I have to take them off - wherever I am - to balance my homeostasis.

May 10, 2008


Eforexcellenceaward1 Blogging excellence is difficult to define in a few short words, and the meaning will differ from one person to the next, and probably depend on personal preferences. I can’t pinpoint my definition, but I think going with the punches, and adapting to change is an important part of blogging. Let’s face it, there are moments - especially after a long period of time - that can test a blogger. Writing material on a daily basis can pose challenges, especially if outside events change and life hoists additional demands. I can’t say my life has been absolutely perfect or idyllic this year, but there are worse things in life, and one of the positive things in my life is being able to read others’ writings, and enter an alternative world, for part of my day, and come across things that originate in other parts of the world.

So to be included in the E award by Caroline, who lives so far away from me, is fab, and a big thank you goes out to Caroline (keep an eye out for the next feminist carnival as well).

As for my list. What criteria have I used? Various. There is longevity, variety, controversy, fun, readership, and on it goes. I remember being asked via email, early in the piece (I think in 2006), about the steps taken to start a blog. At that point this blog was a year old, and I couldn’t really give a definite answer. Finding something to write about or a focus is one thing, but getting a blog to be read is another thing. For that, patience is important, as is providing input to other blogs, or getting out there. The Blogosphere is like a party; people mingle and it is through this process that readers are found and new blogs are discovered.

So my E list, in no specific order.

Revellian: Bobby writes about various topics, but he isn’t shy of revealing his intimate thoughts on life, whether they be about racism or politics. There are many times where I read and think, 'wow, this is how I think on a subject,' and I guess it's more proof that hemispheres don't really make that much of a difference.

Marcelle: Although Marcelle has had a little break this week, she has accomplished a lot in a phenomenal time. Her sex writing is sharp and tasty, and her expressive writing adds new dimensions to topics/issues.

Alexsuze: This couple is a necessary stopover. They have been blogging for quite a while, more than three years now, and are never short of a story, review or topic of discussion.

Rupert: He’s had a recent break, but I think I saw him recently ‘open’ his doors. He drapes his writing with the literary equivalent of chocolate, and his talents also extend to film and spoken word, to name the few things.

Nina: For someone like me, who has no idea about baseball, Nina’s revealed herself to be a baseball afficionado, but apart from that, she’s a woman who adapts to change, and is quite intrepid. Everything from married life with child, to the latest iPod/Apple development can be found in Nina’s blog.

AAG: Some people ask me where I find the time to do the things I do, but I reckon they ought to be asking Always Aroused Girl where she finds the time (and get off my back lol): Jane’s Guide Reviews, Eden’s Fantasy’s product support, Fleshbot round ups, and time for her blog as well.

Alison Tyler: Alison is a new addition to my blogroll, but I have been aware of her existence as a writer and erotica editor for a while, and I have to say that I’ve learned a lot from the insights she has written about in her blog, and has had published on ERWA - all of which have made me feel like saying, ‘phew,’ I can identify, but more importantly, I consider myself a newbie, and there is always room for insight and learning.

Real Adult Sex: Figleaf has been going strong for a few years now, and his posts may be written from the other side of the world, but it is one part of the world that is of interest, that seldom makes its way Downunder: the issues, debates and discussions, some of which aren’t always sex related, but also venture on gender politics, which is still a reality within mainstream society.

April 30, 2008

I Don't Like Facials

To be exposed, even by accident, to scenes of rape or extreme sexual violence posing as sexual kink, that subtly diminishes consent, for fantasy purposes, was not a part of my life as a child or as a teenager.

Today, it is all a different story, one that is opening debate and stirring people into a frenzy. Some feel they are immediately victimized via laws that aim to create some middle line where adult content is concerned, and others clearly don’t like the idea of extreme porn being passed off lightly without question or debate. Others still, dare not express a real opinion lest they offend people. I really couldn’t care about that. I feel that it is much worse to bullshit and feign overall acceptance of everything without any debate or question.

Continue reading "I Don't Like Facials" »

April 20, 2008

Want Some Heels with That?

Australian blogging doesn't get more exciting than this. The downunder version of The Devil Wears Prada is taking another turn, today's Sunday Telegraph had a larger feature on the blog. I hopped online to see if the newspaper had the article online so I could post an example of what makes corporations go nuts.

I never thought 4 inch heels could be so dangerous, but ACP is in a spin - according to the article:

"Editors are trying to decipher if their staff are involved and senior management are observing it closely."It's disgraceful; it's horrible the level of bitchiness.

I do dread what can happen when women in high positions go nuts (or become paranoid). All the staff are possibly on tenterhooks, and there must be a climate of fear in many magazine offices at this current time. One of my fondest memories of my female 'boss' includes a mini office witch hunt to find who lowered her 'stats' as a competent manager. How dare someone be truthful in a confidential work survey, and tick the box that said, "I am seldom rewarded as an employee?" The cow was sashaying through the office with the survey results whining and bitching about 'who would have done this (who would have said the truth?),' then she began singling out possible candidates, meanwhile I was trying not to hyperventilate, you see I was one of the office drones who ticked that box.

As for 4 Inch Heels being 'bitchy', I beg to differ. There can be nothing bitchier than the world of fashion.

I've been following articles (as they appear), and although I've never been one to think that blogging changed 'the world,' this morning I arrived at a small insight: It all depends on the definition of 'world'. The 4 Inch Heels blog has ignited stress at Australian Consolidated Press, which may be thought of as a micro world, and any blog that makes a corporation go into a spin gets kudos from me. ACP charge too much for the regurgitated magazine content they constantly publish in their 80% advert filled women's magazines.

April 10, 2008

Celeb Gossip, Satanism, Kinky Sex (and Satan)

I am becoming addicted to Celebrity blogs. There I said it. They have saved me almost $12.00 per week on the likes of Woman’s Day, New Idea, and New Weekly. I feel I am finally free - well almost. What amazes me about these blogs is their updates. It makes more sense to read the blogs than purchase the once weekly updated magazines.

The sections I find amusing are those which are nameless or the blind sections that open up a universe of speculation, that have people comb their brains for probable celebrity suspects. But the comments can be equally entertaining.

In Crazy Days and Nights, the latest blind item discusses an ‘unnamed’ actor who is an Anton LaVey fanatic, who owns a signed first edition of the Anton’s Satanic bible, and it is the stuff of gossip columnist’s dreams, but when kinky sex entered the comment stream, it became hilarious:

Comment: Satanism is just an excuse for pretentious kinky sex
Comment2: I’d rather hang with a Satanist than a Sci (Scientologist)
Comment3: I’d rather hang with fuckin Satan than Tom Cruise

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