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5 posts categorized "fun"

September 19, 2008

My New Lolcat....

funny pictures
moar funny pictures

Click the pic and vote for my kitties!
I took the above image in the early hours of yesterday...round about 3AM when I heard little Zelda squirm (with gusto) in a paper shopping bag in the kitchen.

June 10, 2007

"The Glow in the Dark Project"

This is like the condom equivalent of the Blair Witch Project. Three guys camping out, on a scary night...listening to screams, that scare the crap out of them. But there's a solution. This little ad also says a lot about energy conservation, in the form of a glow in the dark condom. Why waste electricity or battery power, when you have a glow in the dark franger? Do you think Al Gore will appreciate this innovative, alternative use of light energy? This Aussie condom ad is hilarious.

April 09, 2007

Sex & Music

I was reading about the OhMiBod online the other day (it takes me a while to catch up a lot of news), as I was typing a story, and thought it logical; the marriage of sexual arousal and music makes sense. This vibrator would have to be the most innovative vibrators for women. It only goes to show that a sex toy doesn't have to be neon hued to be innovative; it all depends on what its functions are. Personally, I find the idea of listening to a steady vibratory hum tedious. The thought unraveled further, probably because I was busying myself with a story for my Sex & Music blog. Anyway, if you’re intrigued by the innovative idea of blending song with vibes, you should step into the Lazy Geisha, where Nina has written a comprehensive review on the OhMiBod. It’s sold on me. The idea of listening to my favorite CD of all time, Metallica's S & M, kinda makes me hot.

~~

Did you say story with sex?

Thierry is a man about town. He makes the occupational equivalent of a sea change, opting for a job where he’s in full control. It’s a job that allows him to eat his sexual cake….

That is, until he checks his voice messages and is intrigued by the youngish, female voice on the other end….

The story resides in Sex & Music.

It’s written to the tunes of one of my favorite Aussie bands, Silverchair. The song is from their new CD Young Modern.

Click here to enter my Sex & Music Blog and directly to the story, and leave your erotic plot expectations and/or inhibitions at the door.

December 23, 2006

I'll take the Steel Handcuffs...

The complexity of the pursuit adds more excitement to the erotic element or fantasy, and the more inaccessible a person, the more exciting they become. A person doesn't need to read dating guidelines or tips, its' a fact of life. The more difficult a person, the more intrigue and this is one of the daily things I visit. I've found myself a difficult customer, and it's become so freaking exciting all of a sudden. If he flopped his dick out and said, 'Righteo Ana let's go,' my libido would flow toward the nearest drain. So I view this person and think, 'what will break you?'

‘Tis the season to be busy; people pound city pavements looking for the ideal Christmas presents, and I couldn’t avoid recalling the times I’d be dating people during this period and forking out for presents. I’m not a miser, but can’t help thinking how much I’ve saved being single this Christmas.

I’m the type of person that needs a choke chain to hold back each time I’m involved with a person; I may as well put my soul on my sleeve, never mind my heart. Making the effort to find that perfect gift, for the males in my life - back then - was like giving an extension of myself. It’s not so much about the money spent, more about the thoughts preceding the gift: thoughts that determine the choice of gift and if a person doesn’t reciprocate? I’ve been there, done that and cringed a million times after the event so for the last two years, I’ve earmarked the Christmas lead up as the non ideal time to get involved with anyone. I don’t date, talk, and I don’t bother flirting with any dude making goo-goo eyes. As for the right criteria for gift giving during Christmas? I have no answer, but this week, in light of all the stuff at work and the Kris Kringle moments, my mind ran riot, particularly where difficult customers came to mind.

Secret Santa/Kris Kringle is fun if you don’t have a pissy dollar limit that restricts shopping to the Dirtythoughtnearest two dollar shop. One of the places I worked at, a few years ago, had a ten dollar limit. Maybe it’s the Greek in me, and the fact that cheapie stuff is no option when Christmas rocks around; we did tend to go a little over the top with that Trojan Horse.

I thought about R rated gifts that would set tongues wagging, and be the talk of the office for years to come. Alas, it remains a fantasy, because Secret Santa is never a secret. There’s always someone organizing the list of names, and humans being the social animals they are, they talk.

“I got so and so, who did you get? What are you going to get them?” In light of all the regulations out there, buying a racy gift is like dismissing yourself for sexual harassment and buying a shithouse present can have other ugly implications.

For those, namely one person that inspires lewd thoughts, I imagined many things like leaving a wrapped zinger for them to find. Their inaccessibility makes it all the more exciting (and perverse). I thought about handcuffs, and not the fluffy G rated kind. Fluffy handcuffs are too girly for me, and genteel. I think I’d laugh if anyone presented me with fluffy handcuffs so I wouldn't purchase them for anyone just in case. Sure, they‘re marketed to the hilt, but many prefer the real deal and marketing isn't synonymous with sexiness. I thought steel. Hard, cold and durable. It’s the idea behind the material, its sturdiness, that got me going. But to execute something like that, leaving a strange package, is akin to trouble in light of the current emphasis on security. There are also CCTV cameras to consider as well, so I opted to swim in the sea of dirty thoughts the entire week, right down the last minute. I walked out of the building, my face pulsing from the extra circulation (inspired from stripping this person down, handcuffing them to something and doing pervy things to them). I turned up the volume on the iPod, and talked down my rising pulse.

I have to confess that my ideal secret Santa gift to the object of my lust is a pair of steel handcuffs and a nice little card, 'Thinking of you this Christmas.' Handcuffs play into my personal blowjob fantasy, something that features a lot of powerplay; pain, pleasure, agony and lots of fellatio in between, along with 'I'm just going to have a little break now, don't go anywhere!' and them knowing they can't go anywhere or relieve their erection until I fucking well say so.

There’s always 2007.

September 03, 2005

Light Sabres and Vibrators

Channel 10 is playing Star Wars: A New Hope. At the very minute Obi Wan Kenobi and Darth Vader are in the middle of a light sabre fight and it only dawned on me now how the whirring sound, as it's filtering through to this room here, is starkly similar to the whirring sound of a....

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© Anastasia Mavromatis 2005 - 2008